Should I tri?

I haven't talked about it much, but I ran the LA Marathon Charity Relay with Train 4 Autism. My husbands coworker/boss/mountain biking friend runs with them and he got us involved as well. I had never ran ANY part of the LA Marathon and it was an experience in itself. The relay was weird. I got up to run, and then sat stood around for 5+ hours waiting for the start, we want to do it again next year but switch legs, I do the first part and he does the second. Then in 2015 I might run it all myself, but that's getting way ahead of myself. With Train 4 Autism it was a different experience, in a good way - I met some GREAT people.

Here's the group that was doing the relay, we were all waiting at the 13 mile point for our partners, but had time to kill - so we got coffee. 

(The Husband and I post relay....I did not feel good in this picture, he on the other hand had finished 3 hours earlier and had a beer or two while waiting.)

While waiting for the shuttle I started talking to Jeanine. She's kinda awesome, we wish we lived closer so that we could run/workout together. While on the bus we got on the subject of something I never thought of even attempting.

Jeanine and I on the bus (and Ben the Train 4 Autism Founder behind us)

A Triathlon.

She planted a seed. Then she told a couple of other people she planted the seed. She's kind of an evil woman, but still awesome.

The seed she planted was for this tricarson .

It's the shortest distance, it's reverse, swimming use to be one of my strengths. I haven't swam laps in years though. Swimming in an ocean would scare me because of my irrational fear of seaweed. But this swim is in a pool.

A few weeks ago, Katie over at Moms Little Running Buddy (it's a cute site and she gives good advice) re-posted an older post of hers about Triathlons. It's like she was reading my mind. You can read her post about it here. The thing that stood out to me the most from her post was this:

Finally, what if I get halfway in and want to give up or wonder what I have gotten myself into. 

Guess what, you wouldn't be the first to think that.  I distinctly remember that moment where I wondered why I was doing this but I did it anyway and am soo glad I did.  It's an addicting feeling that you'll never regret.  Pain only last for a short time, that feeling of accomplishment lasts forever.  Suck it up!  You'll get through it.  If it makes you feel any better, one time, I actually had to walk my bike on a course.  It was extremely hilly and my legs just wouldn't do it.  No matter what you'll finish and you might even meet some amazing people along the way.  

That stuck with me. I've talked on here before about my fear, I'm afraid of pushing myself. I know it stems for issues from my childhood that will take lots of therapy and time to deal with and neither of which I have the time or desire to do at this point in my life.

Train 4 Autism starts their Triathlon training in May.  So the biggest question I'm facing now is this something I want to do? Will it help me get over my fear of pushing myself? Sometimes I just wish I could get over these fears and be the awesome person that I know I can be.

Excuses, Expectations & Fear

I'm full of all three.

I want to run in the mornings - but I'm too tired and it's too cold. I start a new job next week so my hours will change. I'll be able to run after work again (which I LOVED!). But that excuse of starting a new job next week is stopping me from running today. Makes perfect sense, doesn't it?

I want to run next months LA Marathon Relay (I'm running with Train 4 Autism - awesome people & group if you want to donate to my team Cassie & Scot Train 4 Autism page ) in under 2:50. Can I do it? Yes, I can. If I put in the work. Will I do it? That is the question.

I want to see results, but I don't want to put in too much work. If I don't put in the work my time won't improve. I know this. I know what I need to do, but I keep coming up with excuses not to.

Which brings me to fear.

Fear is unfortunately running rampant in my life right now.

I have fear with running - I want to push myself but am scared of getting hurt. But how will I know what I can do if I don't push? What am I waiting for? Why can't I push myself now? Why do I keep holding back? I KNOW I can go faster then I do, yet I'm afraid to be uncomfortable.

I'm also living with fear. A few weeks ago my house was broken in to while my husband and I were both at work. I came home and found the back door broken. I called 911 and they searched the house to make sure there was no one in it. Stuff was dumped out everywhere - dressers, desks, closets, wine cabinet. All that was stolen was electronics and feeling safe in my house. We've taken measures to protect our house, but I'm still trying to get over my fear of leaving the house. We are going to adopt a dog soon, which I know will help.

Maybe what I'm trying to say is - I need to let go of the excuses and the fear if I want my expectations to become reality. There's no reason I can't be a faster runner. There's no reason I can't wake up earlier to work out. There's no reason I shouldn't feel safe in my own house. Once I let go on my excuses and fear I will be in a better place.

A Year in Review....but not really

Towards the beginning of the month I saw so many blog posts of people I follow on twitter recapping the 2012 year and all their running. I thought about doing that, but I realized this year that running led me to something deeper.

Running opened up a whole new world for me - a world that I didn't know would exist within my world. I stepped outside my comfort zone many times this year. From cheering on random people at the Disneyland Half (and making a sign for random strangers and hoping to SEE random "strangers" (@runlikeacoyote & Teal and Beth from @Lifeisarun), dressing up in costume at a half marathon, making a Got Chocolate Milk video and asking people to vote on it, to actually talking to Dorothy from @MilesPosts in Vegas (while there was a print out of the magazine cover she was on to our right). It wasn't just people that I met (or hope to meet - Lisa (@runlikeacoyote) and I will both be running the same half in January and one of my goals is to meet her in person!). It was the things I've learned, both about myself and running.

I learned a lot about myself this year. I learned that I don't like getting up in the morning to run before work because it's cold, but I love the feeling after. I discovered the greatness that are Pro Compression socks (and FINALLY no blisters!). I've learned that even though its one of the hardest things to do that I LOVE trail running. I've learned that other peoples running adventures have shaped mine, even if they don't know it - I've read their blogs, tweets, etc and those people have proved to me that it can be done if you believe in yourself. I've learned that I really like running, and proving people wrong. I've learned that I need to stop doubting myself. I've learned that there are limits with everything, except running. I've also learned that the only limits I have when it comes to running are the ones that I put on myself. In 2013 I plan on pushing myself even further outside my comfort zone and past those limits.

Running faster, gaining confidence and getting lost (and a name change)!

First of all, I decided to change the name of my blog. I'm a slow runner. I embrace being slow, I'm ok with it.

But - I'm getting faster.

I ran a mile in 10 minutes and 30 seconds. Normally I run in the 12 minute range. I was thrilled. Let me start at the beginning.

My husband @scotbritton was going to run the San Jose Rock and Roll half marathon. I was not, I'm doing the LA half at the end of the month and I thought it was too close together for me. During my training for the half, I was scheduled to do an approximate 6 mile run that weekend. At first I thought I would just run around the area of the hotel or use the hotel gym. During the time I had these thoughts Rock and Roll started to promote their horribly named "mini marathon" it was approximately 5 miles and was at the same time as the half. I debated running it - I hate the name of it. There is nothing wrong calling it a 5 mile "fun run" or something similar. But, at the last minute I decided to run it, figured it would give me something to do during the time my husband was running. I started in corral 3 (our placement was based on our 5K time) and my husband was in corral 11, we decided to see how long it would take him to "catch" me. My first mile was 10:30, I imagine it was because I was with the faster runners, but it felt GREAT. I wasn't getting tired, I felt like I could go further at that pace, but decided that I needed to slow down. I didn't want to hurt myself. At about 2.5 miles when I was walking, my husband "caught" me and passed me and he was off. When I got to the 5K point my time was in the 37 minute range. I had a new PR for a 5K!!! I finished the mini. It was less then 5 miles....but just barely, but even with that my 5 mile time would have been my best time. I was happy. I felt confident and knew I can do it.

I've started to feel more confident with my running, I feel like I am finally seeing progress and feeling great about it.

This past weekend called for my longest distance so far. 10 miles. I normally wake up early, go to the beach and run on the bike path before it gets too crowded. I knew that there was construction one way on the bike path so decided to go the other way towards Marina Del Rey and towards Venice Beach Boardwalk - a route that I hadn't ran before. I had a GREAT pace going in the Marina and towards the board walk. I felt confident. I knew I could do it. I thought of turning around at 4 miles out, but decided I wanted to make it to the Boardwalk. I got to the Boardwalk, and then remembered WHY I DON'T GO TO THE BOARDWALK! There are a lot of homeless people wondering on it in the morning, there were cops, but I just didn't feel safe. After taking a quick picture I turned around and headed back. Did you see the part where I said I hadn't ran that route before? I missed the street I need to turn down. Ended up lost in the streets of the Marina, trying to get to the bike path. I asked 2 people for directions - neither were helpful. Tried to figure out the maps on my phones - I'm bad with directions. After about 30-45 minutes of wandering around seeing if the streets were going to get me out of my little adventure, I found people who were headed to the bike path and followed them. By the time I got to the bike path I was at 10 miles and running out of water. But I wasn't done, my directional mishap added almost 1.5 miles to my route. While back on the bike path, I encountered a triathlon  Thankfully only the running portion, but I did all I could to stay out of their way. I got back to my car almost 3 hours after I started my adventurous morning, in a way it was good I went the different route because the triathlon running course was right along the path I normally run.

My run yesterday gave me confidence, even though I got lost, I am confident enough in my ability to run my upcoming half. I am hoping to finish in under 3 hours. I don't care if it's 2:59:59, I want to finish in under 3. The next 3 weekends are filling with running events - next weekend my husband and I are doing the Run For Your Lives Zombie 5K I'm a little scared, but know that I will have fun. I'm excited to see the people dressed as zombies. Then the following weekend is the Rock and Roll LA Half Marathon where I am dressing up as Batman. Then the first weekend in November, a few girls I went to high school with and I (and hopefully my sister in law) are doing the Dirty Girl Mud Run. It's a lot coming up, but I'm excited.


Normally I take a picture post training run -  this was all I could do: